Dry Cleaning Downer

26 Apr
It’s 2011, right?? Technology abounds, right?? The economy is in the crapper, right? So why is dry cleaning still a viable expectation??
I don’t dry clean. I don’t even consider dry cleaning. Dry cleaning is for rich people in movies with somewhere fancy to go to and the dry cleaning is presented to cause a wardrobe malfunction in turn causing the plot to thicken for the forlorn female character. Okay maybe I’m getting carried away, but let’s be real… dry cleaning sucks (a few of my sweaters may disagree), it’s expensive, it’s time-consuming, and I don’t think it should exist.
I wash everything in the washer, and if it doesn’t survive it doesn’t make the cut (I have a weird complex that I think GOD sends me clothes and if he doesn’t want me to have something he takes it away and vice versa… I know, I know, I’m shopping therapists as we speak). I feel as if dry cleaning is a suggestion not a requirement. I don’t even know where a good dry cleaner is or how I would even go about presenting my soiled items to the man. And what if he screws it up worse than my machine?? Do I kick him too? Or just accept it and pay him my hard-earned dollars cussing on my way out the door??
Perhaps dry cleaning is a use that comes with age. Or perhaps we are in the age where if dry cleaning is needed, we obviously haven’t achieved far enough advancements in fabrics for my liking and I need to have a talk with someone in charge of this scam. Capiche? Capiche.


One Response to “Dry Cleaning Downer”

  1. Allie May 26, 2011 at 12:01 AM #

    I dry-cleaned once, which was my suit for one of my grad school interviews. it took a week and the damn suit came back more wrinkly than if i had dried it in a wind tunnel. needless to say, i did not dry clean the next time and it looked much better

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