Pleasantville Pretty

29 Aug

It's like America's Next Top Barbie.

I’m on a specific quest and am taking suggestions… suggestions on how to reach my goal of “appearing” put together at all times. I’m not talking perfection like “I’m a Barbie Girl, In a Barbie World”… I would just settle for the idea that I do own a brush, understand how to use makeup, and occasionally acknowledge the use of an iron.

You know those people who are always put together perfectly? Like they’ve been photoshopped since birth and their lives must be like Pleasantville everyday with perfect skin, pressed clothes, and each hair in place…and they seem to move like they are floating or on some sort of moving walkway with a permanent hair blowing fan and camera ready lights. That’s my goal. Unfortunately, if you go to this Pleasantville place and then you look over the fence, there you’ll find me. I dunno if the grass is greener, but it’s definitely more disheveled… And it most likely needs a mowing.

Is this sort of flawless presence something you are born with? It doesn’t matter how long I spend trying to put myself together or to what lengths I’ve gone to reach unattainable perfection… In about 5 minutes I will look like I’ve been hit by truck, found myself in a windstorm, and just rolled out of bed all simultaneously, with at LEAST one stain, a new pimple, and a crimp in my hair that magically came out of nowhere to show for it. It’s like Bridget Jones, but in reality the movie never ends.

Several of my friends have this skill to look terrific at all times no matter what…even after a real windstorm! (Irene would have nothing on them). I wish they had a class for this type of thing because I would pay tuition and take notes furiously…or maybe they did and I missed it while I was too busy trying to get that crimp out of my hair and the coffee out of my shirt.


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